With no relatives nearby to watch my son, my dating life is restricted to Monday nights and alternate weekends.The schedule makes intimacy difficult and the dating (and mating) dance tends to be, well, not very easy. So what’s the thing about dating that bothers you most? All the good ones are taken…check this out: If you live anywhere near a major metro area, and are looking for a man over 40, 5’8” or taller, college educated, non-smoking, making a higher than median income…statistics say that there are over 2000 of these guys within 20 miles of you looking for love online. As long as you let yourself believe that your lack of connection with a good man is about T-H-E-M…then you don’t have to take responsibility. DO NOT tell me that in the first 10 minutes of meeting a man you can know that he is a potential suitor or life partner. Quick judgments are often more about you than the man sitting in front of you. I did it for about 30 years and I experienced all the hurt, confusion, frustration, hopelessness, boredom, and exhaustion that comes with it. There are about 45 million single men over the age of 35 in the United States, about 7 million in Britain and 2 million in Australia. And before you say…but, Bobbi, these aren’t quality men. If you’re like I used to be as a single gal, it’s because it gives you permission to stay the same and stay single. Unless he spits when he talks, smells, or is drunk; give him a chance.Go for Raya.) If you go this route, prepare to be Googled and judged.Making it past their screening process is no easy feat (unless you happen to be a minor celeb, you’re going to need some luck! But before you thumb your nose at it, it’s worth noting that if you’ve got a hobby that you really care about in your 40s—such as staying really fit, which we wholeheartedly encourage—it’s a terrific way to meet a compatible, like-minded person.The app traffics mainly in creative types and anything ultra status-y: celebrities, people who work in the media, athletes, and even reality TV contestants.(Want to a shot at model and actress Cara Delevingne, or even Sharon Stone?
And when I saw it, and dealt with it, my life changed.
Yours will too.) Here are your action steps: • Write your list of qualities, values, and behaviors that attract you and that you expect in a man with whom you spend time.
• Review your list and decide: does this man exist?
The woman, who is divorced but says she would love to be married again, describes herself as being ‘on the wrong side of 45 with a brace of kids’ and bewails her place in ‘relationship no-man’s land’, condemned to be alone for the rest of her days.
Her outpourings, which convey with unflinching honesty the huge difficulties older women can face finding a man, have caused quite a stir on women’s internet chat forums.